Archive for October 2007

Wordless Wednesday. Volume 1, Issue 5: “Happy Halloween.”

October 31, 2007

Not My Image!


Happy Halloween!

October 31, 2007

I know, I know… I’m missing posts. I would have everything back by now, but I have no idea if I’ll ever find all of the posts. So, if you have any of them or know where I can find them, please let me know.

The whole ordeal with the sites getting messed up and everything going back to earlier this month is because one of the hard drives died on the server that I am hosted on and, guess what?, that disk also had the “daily backups” that everyone is guaranteed. So, yeah. Whenever I get the money, I’ll be leaving HostNine.

In any case, I won’t be updating too much until I get the site(s) back up. It sucks, but I lost a ton of stuff that I had been working on–like several days work on php. Gah. The only good thing that I get out of this is the free month of service because of this huge mistake.. Since I doubt I would have had the money to pay for it anyway.

Besides all of this, I’m sick and I just want it to go away.. Gah, I hate head colds. They just suck. Period. Gah.

Good news? Our mice had a litter a couple of days ago. Ten. Yeah, ten.

Well, I’ll certainly be working on everything once I feel better, but until then–HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!

Comment posted by Donnie
at 11/1/2007 4:03:43 AM

With as much crap as you’ve had to go through with this host I’d leave the damn thing too. Happy Evil Pumpkin Day.

You Bitch!

October 5, 2007

Take away women’s votes because “women are voting so stupidly.”

Okay, so she’s blaming women that are open-minded and liberal for 9/11? What about the conservative, republican government that knew about the threats and did nothing to stop it from happening? Does that mean we should take voting rights away from fat men or religious zealots because they vote poorly in our opinion?

A New Day.. Is it Halloween Yet?

October 4, 2007

Halloween is my favorite holiday. Or, should I say, un-holiday. We used to get off school for Halloween so the kids could go trick-or-treating that night, but, in our conservative little community, they think of it as a satanic day, so, it’s almost shunned by many houses.

Honestly, I just like to go to those houses and knock on the door in the middle of the night. They never have their lights on and they will call the police on you. Those people are just evil–Halloween is a fun little holiday for children, but they take it all wrong. Evil bastards.

They are probably the same type of people that made Christmas a present holiday with Santa Claus, then got pissed off because it wasn’t about Jesus anymore. Oh well, grow up. Children need things like this, because the world is a horrible place and the holiday season helps out and gives them many quality family hours that they will never get otherwise.

Also, I don’t put Christmas–I write Xmas. It’s not because I don’t believe or anything like that. I know the purpose of the holiday and I don’t mind that so much because people have changed it so it can be taken in small doses by children. I write “Xmas” because Jesus’ name in Hebrew starts with a “X” and that was the original purpose of shortening it to “Xmas,” not because people hate your lord and savor.

So, before you bitch a fit, read up on the facts. It’s common knowledge and you would think that someone so educated in the bible and all other biblical works would know such a thing..

Wordless Wednesday. Volume 1, Issue 4: “Old Water.”

October 3, 2007

This Past Week..

October 3, 2007

The past week or so has done a number on me. I’ve been working on the blogs for the whole BME/IAM situation (find it all here) and I think it’s getting to me.

I mean, I’m in a serious relationship and any time that you hear about things happening to other people, it makes you think. It makes one wonder if their relationship(s) might end up the same way.. So, I want to know what I’ve been doing right and wrong in this one.

I do know what I do wrong though. There is a lot. I am rather eccentric, and I have to have everything one way or no way, so that’s a huge vise when living with another person. Also, there are several other things, but mainly my attitude and stubbornness, but I doubt that those things will magically change overnight.

We didn’t even spend the night here yesterday, but that was nice. It was different, and maybe that’s just what we need. Hell if I know, I don’t even really understand myself all too well after all these years, let alone how other people work.

In any case, I’m better and currently alone tonight, save the animals and relatives that are home because of doctor’s appointments tomorrow.

I did change the site theme in order for it to load faster with all the hits I was getting this past week, so it’s rather fast to load and has few (one) image. So, I’ll be changing it to B r o k e n F i n g e r n a i l : : Version 1.3 soon!

Along with that, I changed a lot of themes again and I hope to upgrade again soon. There are lots more ads this time around because we don’t have the money to pay the bills and no one wants to hire either of us. It really sucks and I don’t want to lose the cars.

Anything else? I know that there was something else.. Oh yes! I am selling things on eBay again because I have been unable to come up with money any other way, so you might want to drop by and see if there is anything that you would like to buy.!


October 3, 2007

Dude, check your email sometime. Also, comment whenever you read this. I’ll delete it later, but I was wanting you to call tomorrow so we could do something. Me bored, you bored.

Comment posted by Donnie
at 10/4/2007 5:39:57 AM

It likely won’t be until well after noon, so sleep!

Comment posted by Donnie
at 10/4/2007 5:38:25 AM

Well if you ever change your mind think of me as a private game library.=P

Comment posted by Lady
at 10/4/2007 5:34:57 AM

In any case, I’m going to attempt to get to bed. Maybe, who knows?

I am getting tired though. Hell, just call me later and I should wake up. I’m supposed to get a call before ten as it is, so I will not want to get up for that one. Oh well, is that anything new? I like to sleep in..

Comment posted by Lady
at 10/4/2007 5:33:19 AM


That doesn’t really work all that well. My old PC could handle some games now-a-days, but I only use my laptop and it just gets by with playing The Sims 2 when I want.

Comment posted by Donnie
at 10/4/2007 5:31:03 AM

Psh, name the game I have that you want and you can borrow it, I may not even play it anymore.=P

Comment posted by Lady
at 10/4/2007 5:28:48 AM

You have NWN2? I fucking hate you. I swear, you have every game I’ve wanted and never had the money to buy. You do know that I hit people for that, right? Because I will hit you.

Comment posted by Donnie
at 10/4/2007 5:23:11 AM

My computer has a handle on the top specifically for carrying it around.=P Update is nearly done anyway, been doing it all day. Updates are why I never finished NWN2, the game is so bug filled that I don’t want to play it out again until I update, but the update will take weeks. The damn autoupdate things on NWN games suck ass too.

Comment posted by Lady
at 10/4/2007 5:20:27 AM

That’s why Chris has been telling me and J. that we can come over and steal the internet from him. Is there a manual install for it? I could download it sometime and hook you up, because I doubt you’d want to carry your PC around with you..

Comment posted by Donnie
at 10/4/2007 5:18:15 AM

I woke up at like 3:15 and am now in the process of updating MTG:Online. The joys of updating enourmous programs on dial-up!

Comment posted by Lady
at 10/4/2007 5:14:33 AM

Lol, that’s because you can’t drive.
But, hell, I didn’t learn how to that long ago.

The Technical Aspect of the Downtime at IAM. Posts with the Personal Stricken.

October 2, 2007

Let’s just start from the beginning with what information I’ve already posted and see what the trouble was, shall we?

Shannon’s first, and deleted, post on ModBlog:

Over the last month or two Rachel and Jon have taken control of key aspects of BME without my consent in what seems to be a hostile takeover attempt. Last night false charges were filed against me and I just got out of prison, upon which I discovered that I had been locked out of administrative sections of all the servers as well as being totally locked out of BME. I don’t know how long this account will remain before it is deleted or locked out as well, because attempts were made to lock me out of IAM also. I do not have control over or any of my other servers either so I am unable to fully post this update. Please pass it on because it may be deleted.

I can be reached at

If my access here is cut off or they deactivate the site I will post updates to and elsewhere.

I hope that a reasonable resolution to this can be found, but never in my life have I felt so betrayed or had such underhanded, despicable, and deceptive attacks launched at me. If a claim is made that this situation has been resolved and it is not co-posted to at least, do not assume it is me making the post.

As you can see, a lot of that did have technical stuff in it. Everything about him being locked out of the system matters, but at the same time the wording isn’t so great since it has a lot of personal feelings in there.

Next is Jon’s post on ModBlog that was also removed, where it is rather hard to strike out the personal:

This is Jon posting as Shannon

As you can see, Shannon has not changed his password. For someone who fears being locked out you’d think the first thing any knowledgable computer person would do is change their password. He left his password the same because he wanted me to delete his post, because that would have only “proved” his continuing lies.

The betrayal post was deleted by him after a close friend called him out on using all of you to do his dirty work by slandering us. Believe it or not, I personally do not care, and to be very clear Im not here to slander anyone, Im posting to defend myself.

I had the courage to do what needed to be done in a very hard time, and all of you are slandering me based on another persons word.

Unless you know Shannon personally, your opinion of him or who controls BME is irrelevant. If you were not here last night talking to the police, or at the police station. I had to go because of shannons outlandish statements about me to the police, and I didn’t even witness what happened. I have known him for at least 5 years and have LIVED IN THE SAME HOUSE with him the entire time.

I removed his access to business essential systems after I received a call from Rachel saying she had just been assaulted, it was clear that he was being very irrational and was acting out of control. If you run a “family” business you may understand my reasons for doing so.

I have been the sole sysadmin for BME for over 3 years, I am responsible for all of our machines and services 24/7/365 and I take that responsibility very seriously.

IAM members, feel free to search his page for my name and see all that I have done for BME in the past, it certainly seems like most of you require a history lesson. I have saved BME countless times, and I have improved the overall quality of service 100 fold, and this is the thanks I get.

From Shannons page:

2006/02/24 21:23 Sorry for all the trouble. I assure you “it hurts me more than it hurts you” — not that such a statement is relevant or consolation in the least!

Anyway, big thanks to Jon for temporarily donating his server (so his own site is currently offline) in order to keep BME online. We’ve tested the existing account, additions of new accounts, as well as the interface to IAM (and I’ve cleared up space for new accounts here also). That said, there may still be problems, so please tell one of us the details if you believe you found one.

Theres plenty more search for yourself

If you are my friend, if you know me personally, you know what type of person I am. Defend me if you wish, I wont hold it against you if you dont.

Again, harsh. Actually, I find it worse the more times I read it. Nothing much more to be said there.

And here is Rachel’s post. I’m not for sure whether she or Jon posted first, so I’m just going in alphabetical order:

Shannon is not locked out of Modblog or IAM. It is the other way around. He has suspended both my page and Jon, our sysadmin. There are two things that he does, updating modblog (after Phil sends him images to post) and updating his personal blog.

He lied/exaggerated about being “sent to prison” as he spent a few hours in a police station just blocks from the house. I am not the “ex” wife. I am still his wife. Shannon and I are married, have not even legally separated even though I left him in the beginning of 2006.

I own 100% of BME and have been running the behind the scenes for almost 7 years. I do not enjoy the limelight so I stay out of it. I run the business as has been public knowledge until Shannon’s removal of links to me and references. Shannon is the “face” of BME. A public persona that you are all exposed to. If you don’t know who I am or who Jon is, that is because you haven’t been around or very long. Without Jon, IAM would have died last week and nothing would have been done to save it. He didn’t even get a thank you. When a server went down, *I* was the one on the first flight out to rebuild it. Learn your BME history.

I am not going to release the details of why Shannon was arrested. He has conveniently posted here, then said if the post was removed that it wasn’t him unless it was cross posted to It hasn’t been posted so it’s a very easy way to cause more drama. Just like he said he didn’t TOS my page.

Feel free to continue to cast judgment based on a vague post that conflicts itself. Those of you calling me “greedy” and making stupid assumptions about BME/IAM going offline have no idea what you are talking about. You will feel very foolish when this is all resolved and it is made very clear what the FACTS are.

Uh, well, there was a bit of old technical in the last half of that, but it was too hard to try to strike out and make sense, so, it’s all stricken.

Next is another post by Rachel, which was to become the “nicer” post on the IAM page when it was down:

I cannot apologize enough for having to take IAM down without notice. Starting from Thursday morning, the order of events that we suddenly started seeing was that some of the CGI’s were being deleted from the server on a regular basis. We then put in place a mechanism to replace those CGIs when they were removed while investigating the behavior. Once that was in place, we noticed that something was deleting user profiles so we made the decision to turn off services and prevent further data loss while we investigate the matter. It seems that the act of disabling IIS has prevented further account deletions. We are still investigating the matter and require the site to be offline until we are able to pin point the cause of the data loss. Please remind everyone that we have a back up of the site from 9/19/2007 so any profiles that may have been affected will be restored.

As with any unscheduled downtime, we have always credited members with more than the outage period and there has NEVER been an instance where we did not credit members for an unscheduled outage.

As far as I am concerned, no personal information is to be released as it never should have been in the first place.

Well, no offense to anyone here, but, if you didn’t want the personal to be leaked, maybe you all shouldn’t have posted so much about it so far? Just a thought though. I understand how hard that can be when you’re upset.

Following is an update to the last post:

I believe we have figured out what the “deletions” were. They weren’t actual deletions. What would happen was that if you loaded a page, whatever was deleting the CGI file would basically make it so if you timed it properly, it looked like the page you were viewing had been deleted as it suddenly had a background but no information. We didn’t put two and two together until about two hours ago that it wasn’t a REAL deleted page because if you replaced one CGI file, the page was back.

We are still trying to determine what is causing the files to delete themselves but we believe we have figured it out. I am hoping that IAM will be turned back up on Sunday or Monday at the latest, with all users having access and with the current data from the day the site initially went offline.

PLEASE REMEMBER THAT YOUR DATA IS SAFE. We have TWO complete back ups. One from whenever the site originally was turned down and another from the migration on the 19th. No matter what is being said, you will get the opportunity to back up your photos and diaries as soon as the site is back up. I am doing everything I can to return IAM. My intention is to have IAM back up by Monday at the latest.

AGAIN, the files that are deleting themselves are not related to your data. Your photos, diary entries, IMs and everything else will be there just as if you’d never left them!

Soooo… It was just a big mistake? People freaking out and thinking that everything they had on IAM wasn’t being deleted and it was just a big misunderstanding?

Next is a long post from Rachel on her IAM site:

Thank you all for being so patient. I understand that there has been a lot of confusion over what has transpired over the past few days. If you haven’t seen what I have posted in response to requests to clarify the “technical issues”, this basically sums it up:

I cannot apologize enough for having to take IAM down without notice. Starting from Thursday morning, the order of events that we suddenly started seeing was that some of the CGI’s were being deleted from the server on a regular basis. We then put in place a mechanism to replace those CGIs when they were removed while investigating the behavior. Once that was in place, we noticed that something was deleting user profiles so we made the decision to turn off services and prevent further data loss while we investigate the matter. It seems that the act of disabling IIS has prevented further account deletions. We are still investigating the matter and require the site to be off line until we are able to pin point the cause of the data loss. Please remember that we have a back up of the site from 9/19/2007 so any profiles that may have been affected will be restored.

As with any unscheduled downtime, we have always credited members with more than the outage period and there has NEVER been an instance where we did not credit members for an unscheduled outage.

I understand that this sounds scary. I have to admit that I was worried which is why I made the judgment call to disable public access to IAM. This meant that the users could not browse IAM but Admins could. This is why sometimes you would get my explanation and sometimes you would get a “your IP is blocked” message. You have my sincerest apologies about the first “IAM is down” message. It was not acceptable and as soon as I became aware of it, I removed it. I replaced it with a short temporary outage message and then one that tried to explain the situation while we worked to assess it. While many of you don’t know me personally, I have always had the best interests of BME/IAM and the community at large at heart. My first priority is keeping everyone safe and secure.

We basically had a situation, as explained above where specific CGI files were being deleted, if someone was loading a page at the right time, the CGI would just spit out garbage into the cache of that specific page and that was what was making pages look like they’d been deleted. It would be loaded by the next person who saw the page. Luckily no data was lost, no pages were deleted, only the impression that this had happened. Everything turned out to be fairly simply to fix once we discovered what the problem was. Now we need to assess if this is still happening by turning the site back on for the public and see if the same previous conditions will trigger the same type of problem. We continue to have this situation but have confirmed it is doing no damage to data so we are leaving the site up. There will be intermittent errors but just hit refresh.

As always, you can and should back up your diary entries by going here. Your data has always been safe and we do have back up from September 19th, 2007. We will be posting a link to do the exact same for your photos so you can download them in a single zip file by the end of the week. I will post as soon as it is available. I know that going through your pages looking for each photo is not easy. This will make it much easier for those of you who do not wish to keep your IAM pages so if you would like to give it a couple days, we’ll do all the work for you.

Thank you again. I hope everyone can understand the situation as I have tried to explain it to the best of my ability. If anyone has any questions, I have always answered my IM’s and emails. Any questions you may have are welcome and I want to assure you that IAM was never going anywhere, we just needed to put a stop to whatever it was that was causing this phenomena.

We will be crediting all IAM pages with one month of free access. I hope that this helps to ease the fears that many of you have. I know how hard it is to go without IAM for even a few hours.

If you have any questions, please feel free to either send me an IM or to post in the forum below. If you find any technical errors, please report them immediately, either via IM or the forum so we may address them as quickly as possible.

Okay, that one was a lot better. She explains that the problem wasn’t so big as they had thought and that they might have made a mistake by taking it down, but she thought it was the best thing to do. All better? Not really. Lots of people thought that the site was down because of the situation with Rachel and Shannon and that it wasn’t going back up.

This next post by Shannon does not settle those fears:

Let me state very clearly that bothRachel Larratt/Zimmerman and Jonathon Marshall have been fired from their former positions at BME (the family of sites) and are operating fully without my consent in their theft of the site and its content, as well as the theft of my personal sites. In addition they have seized control of my other accounts (MySpace, etc.) in an attempt to silence me and spread false information. They are no longer employed my myself, BME, or PsyberCity in any capacity and are possessing the site and locking me and other BME employees out without my consent.

I demand immediate return of all BME properties and access codes, and demand that they immediately cease using my copyrighted content and software.

Eek. That was hard to do. The technical was that they are fired and that they “took over” the sites, but the anger is still rather present in this post. This post has also been deleted from Shannon’s BodyTwo site, so he must have removed it on his own.

In response to questions that arose from the above post, I IMed Rachel and received this short response:

Once everything returns to normal, allof the sites will be operable again. In the meantime I’m not sure what is going on but I’m just trying to repair the damage that was done.

So, draw your own conclusions if you want, but IAM is back and–hopefully–everything will be back to normal soon enough.

Disspelled Rumors About IAM/IAM2.

October 2, 2007

After reading up a bit on the subject of IAM2–which is not associated in any way with the original or BME, except for permission to use the title and coding in it’s name–has been subject to many of the rumors spreading about the community.

Many people thought that since IAM went down for an undisclosed time, as read in the first IAM offline page put up at the start of the events, that IAM2 would take over or that IAM(1) would be shut down for IAM2.

From Phantazm’s, one of the co-owners of IAM2, IAM site, this can be found:

IAM2 Important Information!

I’ve been made aware that as of late there are some “rumors” out there that seem to imply that someone “close” to IAM2 has stated that IAM2 is being developed to “keep people who are into specific mods, or are from specific social scenes, etc., off of IAM“. First off, I wish to assure ANYONE that was under this impression that this is MISINFORMATION and is simply NOT THE CASE!

I’m not certain who may have started these “rumors” (but I have a suspicion, so if you’re reading this I suggest you contact me ASAP!), but as the founder of IAM2 I can ASSURE YOU that this is not the case!

I’ll post more information in my diary here, on IAM2, and in IAM2 forums, but bottom line… IAM2 is NOT BEING DEVELOPED TO DRAW PEOPLE AWAY FROM IAM in any way! Period!

On behalf of IAM2, I officialy and publicly apologize for any misinformation or misunderstanding! Again, be above “rumor” is NOT TRUE!

So, it can be said that the rumors where floating around before the unexpected downtime of IAM, but it helped spread them faster.

From Phantazm’s IAM2 site, this can be found about the newer rumors and influx of new users:

Recent events seem to have caused a bit of a surge in user registrations here at IAM2. Please note that at this time IAM2 is NOT COMPLETE and we really didn’t plan to “open the doors” for at least another month! However, due to unforeseen outages over on IAM, we’ce decided that since people quite obviously want a place to go (at least in the meantime) that we would give them one.

The rumors of IAM2 trying to “steal” users from IAM are false. Also, IAM2 replacing IAM is false. These are just rumors and should be either ignored or corrected.

When I emailed Phantazm about the current situation, he responded as follows.

Well, all I can say is that IAM going down had NOTHING to do with IAM2
replacing it!  )   As far as what’s going on over at IAM, I’m as much in
the dark as everyone else.

IAM2 is ENTIRELY SEPARATE from IAM.  It is owned by myself and
SorryNoRemorse and BME / Rachel / Shannon / etc… have NO STAKE in it

The “concept” so to speak is based on IAM, and that was done with
Shannon’s permission from the beginning.

So, if you are interested in IAM2, please head over there but do keep in mind that it is still under development.

Hopefully, this will clear up any confusion on the subject.

Hmm, What to Think? (Good Thing I Backed Everything Up Days Ago..)

October 1, 2007

I’m just wondering around IAM, wondering: “What if?”

You know.. What if it went down for good. What if someone else did get control of it. What if the general population was banned from speaking.

Oops, I guess that last one slipped in by mistake.. Because it is happening.

I’m not someone that just blogs about whatever to get hits. I wanted to post these deleted posts from all of the people that had something to do with the downtime on IAM. I am not here to do it because of their “personal” problems. I am here to post their entries as they were when I found them, without anything removed.

If they didn’t want personal matters to enter into this, then none of them should have posted any of it.

The “technical” issues seem, well, to be frank, a dumb reason to take down the site. If someone had just looked into it, none of this uproar would have happened because, in the end, the same problem is still occurring on IAM.

I’m not out to take sides or attack one person or another, but I am not “above” calling out the people that have made mistakes this week by keeping their posts up, even though most of them have now been deleted and everything has been removed.

Now, when I ask questions about the current situation–i.e. Who is running this place? What is going to happen? What if legal issues arise?–I get the same run around as everyone else or I am completely ignored. I cannot imagine that this, being a business and all, can act in such a way towards any member of the community.

Still, I am not angry, no matter how much my post seems to be. I am getting annoyed, however, that when I try to link people that they are never “approved” or “allowed,” though the only reason I can find for this is because when they removed their posts, they wanted to forget about it. People do not always check IAM/BME and some will not find out about this for some time. For those people, I want to give them answers to their questions and allow them to draw their own conclusions.

If I ever seem to be choosing one side rather than another, I do not mean to. I just post the information in the order that I receive it.

Comment posted by Lady
at 10/2/2007 4:24:45 PM

I put it up before it was deleted and it is rather, well, legal sounding. As though, if not returned, that Shannon will have to press charges.

It is posted as the first repost here: <a href=”IAM is Back!
..But There Are Issues.”>IAM is Back! ..But There Are Issues.

Rachel says that she owns BME. The problem that I find with that, is simply that everything on BME says that it is copywritten by Shannon, not Rachel. Maybe she owns the name, but not the material. If that is so, then Shannon still owns the content and it should be handed back over to him.

But I am only assuming the above paragraph, so don’t take it to heart.

Comment posted by BoredSomebody
at 10/2/2007 10:36:36 AM

Yesturday, I believe, there was another post by Shannon on that has since been changed/deleted, basically stating that he should be given his site back and he is ordering the stop to others using his copyrighted material…The whole thing was rather final/legal/hostile sounding.

I didn’t get a copy of it, didn’t think to – if anyone has a copy that should probably go with the rest.

I was around BME about four years ago and I liked it then, I haven’t had the internet for a while, got it again, found BME again – and then less than three days later I’m broadsided by the drama. I somehow expected better of the site and it’s leaders/owners…I’m not judging anything until everything is resolved tho.